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REALLY FREE #12 ***
More streetpunk views from South
Wales, UK. Complete with it's on the
ball news and honest reviews. The tale
from Phil's dark and distant past
following
the Upstarts around the UK,
was always good be good for a laff.
There's even a
Rectify interview plus
gig review, and all this in an 8-page A5
format. Fast, quick and simple!
19p s.a.e. from PO Box Pentre,
Rhonddha,Mid Glam, CF41 7YG,
Wales.
SAVAGE AMUSEMENT No. 9
Jan/May 2000
***
Yet another regular freebie from the
pen of Sir Trev Hagl who has been
doing this sort of thing since the early
80's and still has an enthusiasm worth
anyone's first class stamp. Who said
all beer swigging Asda employees
were all shelf stacking morons? As
always this 12-page A4 newsletter is
dominated by some of the latest new
releases from the world of Punk and
Oi! that are put under Trev's
humourous scrutiny. You can always
bet it's gonna be as honest as your
ever gonna get in this day and age of
corrupt punks, drunks and skunks!!!
There's also a good article on the
state of punk in the 21st century which
hits the nail on the head. A good fast
amusing read. Oh yeah this publication
might be hitting your screens real soon
so keep a look out for it. Still only a
27p s.a.e. will get it ya or a dollar if
your outside the UK.
Trev
c/o Rosehill, 20 New Front St, Tanfield
Lea, Stanley, Co Durham, DH9 9LY, UK
trevhagl@hotmail.com
CODEYE #6
2000
***
This half hearted zine has come on
loads since the last time I read a copy
about 18 months ago. It's actually now
got a layout (slash 'n' epoxy) and a lot
more content. The front cover however
was a disgrace, talk about minimalism.
Don't fanzine editors realise these
days that your front cover has the
capability of making an impact, so
fucking use it!! And
Codeye, (like a lot
of these UK punk zines that seem to
materialise once a year, if your very
unlucky) suffers from the 'well out of
date' syndrome. Although the
argument about reading a printed zine
still holds out (more easier on the eye)
unlike being stuck to a monitor!!! The
'past it's sell-by date info' really rams
home paper zines biggest weakness.
News apart, there's a good interview
with Essex beer monsters
Airbomb, a
strange one page article on the way
the NME treated the recent live
Clash album. Local '77 punks The
Amazing Spacefrogs (who own the
most loathsome band name since
Raggity Anne) have been given a
triple by-pass and bought back to life.
Last years Holidays in The Sun '99
gets yet another review (yawn!). We
are then treated to straight
Vibrators
tour/ interview, written by the bouncing
Czech, Vitek Formacek. This punk
thrusts his articles on any UK zine
who'll print em!!! Closing with an
interesting dissection of a local
compilation of punk bands from 77-82.
There's also a plethora of music/zine
reviews which seem to have overtaken
the short one-liners from last issue and
a good live
Dickies review. Getting
better but still light-years away from
the more regular and motivated zines
and it's still haunted by a PC
impediment!
50p plus s.a.e. from
Robert Slavery, 31 Kerrick Road, Park
End, Middlesboro, Cleveland, TSB
7SB, England.
NOISE POLLUTION
Winter 2000
**
Well this ain't a zine at all, but it could
be the future of the UK high street,
glossy mag arena of the punk scene, if
we really believe in miracles! Metal
Mag Kerrang! are behind it, and they
proclaim
Noise Pollution to be the
trial issue of what could be a regular
mainstream punk rock mag. So
naturally when I seen it on the shelves
of WH Smith, amongst the Q's, Rolling
Stone and Record Collector, I was
somewhat curious as to what was
exactly in store for us punks. This
being the first punk mag on a
newsagents shelf aimed at punks,
since the heady days of
Punk Lives
back in the early 80's. Well for a start it
looks impressive with
Rancid's Tim
Armstrong gracing the cover. And if
that don't make yer spit, you get a
FREE CD (even I can risk listening to
20-odd tracks of pop punk for a dare)
mounted on the cover, a FREE poster
(although Billy Joe from
Green Day is
a bit too young for my seasoned
tastes) and a quartet of punk
postcards. I then clocked the cover
price of £3.95, which considering the
former freebies was worth the perusal.
But what's inside you may well ask? It
looks, feels and smells just like
Kerrang!, but with less hair and lots of
geeky bands on display. There's big
colourful pix of your favourite tattooed
stars and a neat layout that looks
better than it reads. But from there on
in it went down hill fast! Bands like
Grade, Less Than Jake, The Hives,
Jets To Brazil,
need I go on?!!! They
pout up at us in glib delight and
definitely turns an attractive looking
mag into a big fucking plastic disaster.
It's got a silicon feel with cunts like
those littering the pages, and 'Boy
bands' springs to mind! They do
however feature 3 good articles on
New Yoik's
Sick Of It All,
Washington's
Fugazi and Bad
Religion
, but that was it! No other
wings of punk were even considered,
which is a shame and a sham. The
same goes for the zine article which
only covered the safer zines on the
arena, no mention of the likes of
Jellybrain, Puke or Soap N Spikes
who are real thing.
Scanner did head
the cavalry charge, but that was about
it.
Noise Pollution at least got the '50
Greatest Punk Albums Ever!'
marginally correct, with 'Bollocks'
taking the top slot. But you have to
question a
Blink 182 inclusion at
number 14 and 'Crossing The Red
Sea' by
The Adverts not even in the
Running!!! But what's more
confounding is once you've read the
editorial you realise this is just a
bandwagon looking for a new market.
Grebo's and heavy mettallers writing a
so-called punk mag! Where's the
fucking punks???? This issue is totally
aimed at the clean livin, bubble-gum
punk rock crowd of jokers and no
matter how many pix of the
Pistols or
Rancid you throw into the mix to draw
in the crowds, the content tastes just
the same! They want your opinions so
tell em coz I did. Since this review was
written
Noise Pollution
has in fact been sidelined leaving the
door open for
Big Cheese.
SCANNER #8
September 2000
****
Just got this in from the depths of
Ipswich, England. And in keeping with
it's professional text bulging mission,
it's still plotted on a quality control
course, in presentation at least.
Scanner is the most regular UK zine in
today's market. I must admit, when I
looked at the Woody Allen cover to
see who featured in this issue. Out of
the eight defendants on show, I only
recognized Avail (who I find a bore to
listen to). Maybe I'm losing touch, or
my idea of punk is a totally different
beast? So contemplating another
unfamiliar read, I tried my hardest to
keep an open mind. And ain't it just
great to be shocked into submission!
Coz lo and behold the interviews for
the most part kept me riveted, with
bands like the explosive
All, Annalise
from the UK and shock horror... my
nemesis
Avail being particular chunky
highlights. The singer from
Avail is
one of those boxcar masochists (tee
hee), he jumps trains like the old
hobo's, except he does it for fun and
nearly broke his neck doing so!
(snigger). There were also a trio of
nondescript fucking safe cunts posing
as punks like 'ippies
Skin Of Tears,
Shatterhand and the shady, gloomy
intelektualizm of
Grey Area, taking the
jokers card. However the ace in the
pack had to be the punk vet,
Don
Fury
...Don who? Well Don's the New
York hardcore record producer who
has a massive roster under his belt,
including such heavyweight classics
like New York's
Agnostic Front,
Gorilla Biscuits
and the wild
Lunachicks. And although the
appallingly named
Nerth Herder were
a complete and utter joke. I did learn
they were responsible for Buffy the
Vampire Slayer theme tune...wow!!! I
just couldn't take to the political pages
done by pseudo- intellectual, doctorate
of political science's and
Scanner
correspondent, namely Dan McKee.
His regular thesis makes me cringe like
a young kid would do walking in on his
mom getting screwed by the milkman.
The columnists are hit or miss, my
gawd some of these geezers really
lead such interesting lives ...yawn!
Best one however had to be MC
Dogshit's (singer from
Brezhnev
fame). An hilarious but poignant
true-life tale of a punks demise into
heroin and ultimately death. A lesson
for anyone! He also penned a brief but
useful Amsterdam scene report. I think
Steve's gig reviews were particularly
uneventful in this issue. Seeing so
many bands on a regular basis should
conjure up at least 1 memorable
outing, but not this time. A massive
record and zine review section is
always a mountain to climb, not coz of
the volume or way they are reviewed
but coz 70% of the bands and mags on
show are tragically dire!!! Middle of the
road punk for the non-punk masses is
what seems to get sent in/reviewed
nowadays. And the zines this issue are
really bland with a capital B. My god it
really rams home what a very sorry
state printed zinedom is of late...glad
I'm well out of it! I'll say it again, this
mag could be so much better if Steve
didn't lease quite so much space to the
borderline bands, theorists and
general fucking yes men that pollute
our fucking punk scene. Still a good
zine though.
SCANNER
TESTICLE PRESSURE
Winter 2000
****
Woke up the next morning after the
Birmingham punks picnic with this on
my bedroom floor lying amongst the
used syringes and Barbie dolls. On
first impressions it's a one sheet,
FREE,. Tabloid styled attack on
Radical Records. But if you read
between the lines you'll slowly suss out
it's a clever advertising ploy by the
said label. The actual slagging off all
the bands and personality's involved
on it's roster is pretty funny. I thought it
was a great piece of marketing and
when I visited the actual site advertised
below , I realised what a big bunch of
jokers these geezers are. If you want
zany schoolboy humour, tits, dicks and
ain't caught out by the P.C. disease,
check it out. You'll be amused at least
by what's going on at
www.testicle.com
PUKE #5
March 2000
****
Latest installment from my favourite UK
punk zinesters.
Puke is a rough
dog-eared and funny lambast of
hand-written text and crazy cartoon
punk attitudes from the Aylesbury
Contingent that screams snot in the
biggest way!...and all this in the same
issue. The 2 punkettes doing it Becca
and Jemma Puke who are a force to be
reckoned with around the London
Satelitte towns, are an entertaining
pair of youthful punkettes if ever I laid
eyes on one. They give the more
established zines of the day a right
good run for their money and need
encouraging all the more for it. These
girls use their heads and bring this
photocopied mayhem to us through a
scam in the local Office World, which is
a feat in itself. The layout is a top
notch cut 'n' paste mess that any self-
respecting punk rocker should thrive
on, and their views are as admirable
too. My only gripe is the fact that some
of the bands only live up to
substandard humour compared with
the editors nasal verbal. But this is the
biggest issue to date running in at 64
pages so fair cop guvnor! We've got
those 'Weird Shit' reports from around
the globe detailing some very bizarre
events. Joe Strummer gets dragged
over the coals in the regular
disrespectful 'Before They Were Crap'
segment. The reviews are honest and
for the most part the other contributors
are spot on with debates and opinions
galore. Amongst the articles are an old
one featuring ranty Brit punks the
brilliantly named
Thatcher On Acid
plus the editors local faves the now
deceased
Chineapple Punx,
alongside the very unfunny
Chester
with Scotland's
Sad Society (who
have been very quiet of late), plus
another split up band the Thirsky
Write-offs. There's articles purloined
from other sources on the drug culture
and a particular good one by Becca on
how the kids today all look the same.
Plus a wrestling pullout poster. Yeah
this humourous, scruffy punk read is
worth anyone's 50p so get it now for a
real view of the UK punk scene. Issue
#6 should be out any time now!
50p plus A5 s.a.e. from 1 Quakers
Mead, Weston Turville, Aylesbury,
Bucks, HP22 5RS,England.


BLACKPOOL ROX II
June 2000
**
A freebie here carrying on the name of
the early 80's fanzine that was one of
the leading lights in UK fanzine terrain.
So when I seen the name, I thought
hey this will be interesting but I'm afraid
Blackpool Rox II is a pale shadow of
it's former self, both in layout and
character. It's just basically a sterile
squeaky clean 'indie' view of the town's
local band scene, done surprisingly by
Andy Higgins leader of the now defunct
Erase Today. Having said that what
more do you expect for FREE. If you
want a real slice of the Blackpool punk
scene check out
4 Minute Warning.
You can check out this web site
version at
www.jsntgm.com
PULPED
July-August 2000
***
This professional looking publication
has shrunk down in size to an 8-page
newsletter on this the 'Baby' issue. So
if you wanna read the far more
impressive bigger edition you gotta
check out the site or subscribe to a
years issues of that format. Apart from
the usual ads and on the ball gig guide
in this issue you get the Kerrang! and
Fracture exposé's. Which is common
sense. I just think Kerrang! ain't worth
the space in a 'streetpunk' mag and
Fracture are just a sad bunch of
fucking tossers who need blanking or
ridiculing. But I spose someone's gotta
print the blindingly obvious!
FREE from PO Box 12, Lockerbie,
DG11 3BW,Scotland
JELLY BRAIN #7
April 2000
****
Jellybrain 7 is still as vindictive and
still as pissed off as it's predecessor,
but the way it's put over with those half
sneering jibes makes for yet another
brilliant read. This ain't so much punk
rock but what punk rock has spawned.
You don't get jokers like this in the
metal scene or the rave scene or any
other scene, this is a one-off! And it's
still amusing to read the all consuming,
shit slinging war of words with his
(editor-Paul Jellybrain) old musical
cronies still flaring up years after the
event. Ain't it great to witness back
stabbing cunts going for each other
jugular every issue...ha ha. The 3 fast
as fuck one page interviews are a must
just to see what mad questions he's
gonna ask em next. This time around
to savor the irony is Netherlands
full-on backet-cases
Brezhnev, who
know all too well what this Scarborough
cunt is capable of.
The Vindictives
and
The Automatics from Portland
are next in line. The Portlanders get
asked
"I have a friend from America
called Tim, do you know him?"
(tee
hee). The varied live gig reviews has
some great observations, and it puts
the actual bands into the shade by the
curios coming out the reviewers head.
In fact the reviews on a whole are
fuckin real without being creepy or
down right ignorant. There's a fucking
boatload to chew through with some
minor classic snidey remarks and
side-comments coming out. Take for
example the
Agnostic Front review
...
"they might speak in quiet
whispery voices at the garden fete
with the vicar, but there's no trace
of that here!"
(tee hee) This is
English humour at it's best, and if you
can't suss it out, you don't know what
your missing. To top it all off
Jellybrain is bought to us via a vivid
crisp 'n' clean layout with art, cartoons
and those peculiar but amusing facts
and jibes on real life that'll make yer
laff out loud! Highly recommended!
New issue just out so look out for that
soon!
JELLYBRAIN
SLUG & LETTUCE #62
December/Feb 2000.
****
This is 6 months old but I think it
should be given some airing coz this
issue brings home to punk just exactly
what some of the bullies and wankers
who lurk around it's fringes can do.
You may already have heard about the
story of Amyl Nitrate, lead singer with
New York's
Spider Cunts. Well she
got cut up really badly in an uncalled
for attack at a punk party last year.
Well this issue is dominated by the full
story done by a friend of hers who was
present at the slashing last
September. Just get this issue for that
column alone and it's impact which hits
home even more by the brilliant Zero
Content cartoon strip that brings to
light the full bloody scenario. Fair play
to Chris Boarts-Larson who put this
out. On a lighter note there's also 20
pages of punk rock reviews, views and
news so get it coz it's free with an
S.A.E. (but donations are
appreciated). PO Box 26632,
Richmond, VA 23261-6632, U.S.A.
ALL Or Nothing in action
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